“Joseph- Almost Missing It” Matthew 1:18-25 12/16/07
George was engaged to Janet for a December wedding. They had told all their friends. They had picked out the house they wanted to live in. They had sent out invitations. They had signed up for the register at Belks, Bed Bath and Beyond, Target, Sears, Lowes, Home Depot, the jewelry store. They had paid a deposit on the reception hall at the country club. They had reserved a spot at a restaurant for the rehearsal dinner. They had made a deposit at the Hampton Inn for out of town friends. She had picked out her dress. Her mother had picked out her dress. The bridesmaid dresses were picked out. Flight reservations were made. Honeymoon reservations were made. But something happened, and Janet called George the month they were to be married and said that she wasn’t sure. A week later, they had broken it off. What heartache. Of course, the heartache would have been worse if they had just followed through in their marriage and divorced a few years later. But what agony, embarrassment, wasted time, effort, and money! Maybe you have known someone who has gone through this.
Human life is a struggle. It is often depicted this way. It is a struggle between good and evil, a struggle between joy and sadness. Many of us are on the edge of giving up on that struggle because the odds may seem stacked against us.
In our passage, Joseph was struggling. His life seemed to be going his way, he had a wonderful young girl that he was getting ready to marry. He had a trade- carpentry, and he was pretty good at it. Then something happened that knocked his feet out from underneath him- his fiancée became pregnant and it was not by him. You can bet a thousand thoughts were going through his head.
Getting engaged in those days was a really big deal. You signed a contract with the person you were engaged with. You stayed in different homes, but you were preparing for marriage to each other- spiritually, mentally, and physically. Basically you had a pledge of love (that’s what this word engagement meant) to each other. At the time Mary and Joseph were betrothed to each other, they actually had a ceremony- in which they made a pledge to each other in the presence of witnesses the bridegroom would give a fairly large gift to the father of the bride to seal the engagement, and then there was a benediction. In our culture, over half of the people live together before they decide to get married. In the Biblical culture people tried to do that too, but people were more conscious about God’s power to bless a relationship than we are. It is not too surprising that 40% more of the people who live together before marriage end up with divorce after marriage than those who do not live together before marriage. I believe if we keep ourselves pure sexually before we get married, we are also likely to see the importance of that purity after we get married.
But Joseph was thinking that their relationship had failed. Joseph was fairly old, according to strong tradition, when they got engaged. You can bet he was in agony. His hopes of marriage and children depended on Mary and to him this hope was gone. She was pregnant and not by him! He was struggling.
You know, the Old Testament law said that he could have Mary stoned to death for adultery. But he really didn’t want to do that anyway. He didn’t want to embarrass Mary or himself any more. He was just going to go to the priest and dissolve the engagement privately and let it die.
Many people struggle with tough decisions and sorrow at Christmas. Sorrow and sighing do not take a vacation. Death does not stop on this earth at Christmas. We want it to. When bad things happen at this time of the year, it makes it extra hard. Even when bad things have happened earlier in the year—a death, a sickness, a disappointment, a job loss, a broken relationship these things become especially hard now. We so want everyone to be happy, and the family to be altogether, and there be enough- and even more than enough. We want our children and grandchildren to be happy with their gifts. What we really want is heaven—now. But Christmas is only a deposit of a time when the full account can be cashed. It is a deposit on which we can draw from for strength, hope, and even good cheer. But it is a deposit that is not yet complete. Christmas is the greatest reminder that we are not alone in life. It is the great nudge that points us to the love of God—that is not yet made complete in us.
Joseph was disappointed, but he was not alone. I can imagine Joseph going to worship that weekend in agony, full of questions and prayers. I can also imagine the passage being read that day from Isaiah, “The virgin will be with child and give birth to a son, and you will name him Immanuel.” That night, Joseph had a hard time sleeping- as he had every night since he found out about Mary’s pregnancy. An angel came to Joseph in a dream. God did not leave Joseph to struggle on his own. Now, Joseph could have chosen to ignore the angel – saying that the angel himself was just a dream. Joseph could have allowed himself to sink deeper into self-pity so that he could not hear or respond to the angel. But he did not. God reached down to Joseph and Joseph took the gift given. The angel was telling Joseph to not be afraid to marry Mary. She would indeed be faithful to him and her godliness was intact.
So many times in this Christmas story the angels are going around saying, “Fear not.” They are saying, “Peace on earth.” If you are here today in fear, they would also say it to you. If you are here today without peace, they would ask you to seek peace with God and pursue it.
Now Mary, at this time was in Hebron, with her cousin Elizabeth and her husband, Zechariah. She was in effect, in exile from her hometown. In all likelihood, Joseph woke up the next morning, got things settled in his work, and went to Hebron to talk to Mary with her cousin Elizabeth who was also pregnant in a miraculous way. When he arrived in Hebron, one of the first persons he met was Zechariah. This was Zechariah who didn’t believe when the angel told him he would have a son. This was Zechariah the priest. Zechariah couldn’t talk, but communicated by writing. I would have loved to have seen that writing when Joseph came to see him. Zechariah didn’t believe the angel- Joseph did! Yet they were two “angel chastened men” [Whyte]. Probably seeing Zechariah’s inability to talk helped Joseph to believe his angel’s message. Joseph acted on the angel’s advice- tradition says he came to Hebron, got Mary, took her back to Nazareth and married her.
If Joseph had walked by sight and not by faith, then he wouldn’t have married Mary. If Joseph had refused to believe Jesus would have had no earthly father to raise him.
What would have happened if Joseph gave into fear and refused to walk by faith? Joseph in effect, adopted Jesus in faith. There are so many people who were adopted by others. Great poets and musicians- like Johann Sebastian Bach whose parents died when he was 9- his brother (an organist) raised him. Tim McGraw, the country singer, whose father (Tug McGraw) did not admit he had him until he was an adult. JRR Tolkien, writer of Lord of the Rings- who was raised by his aunt after his parents died. Leo Tolstoy, Eric Clapton (raised by his grandparents), Dante Alighieri (rasied by the Dominicans). Oprah Winfrey was raised until she was six by her grandmother. Some famous politicians- Alexander Hamilton (first secretary of the treasury), John Hancock the third president of the Continental Congress- and has his large signature on the Declaration of Independence (whose minister father died when he was seven- his uncle raised him); Andrew Jackson whose father died when he was a few days old, and whose mother died when he was 14- he was the only president born in South Carolina. In the Bible, of course, we have Lot- raised by Abraham or Moses who was found in the bushes. I think one of the toughest- most wonderful forms of human love is when someone who is not a parent raises a child as their own. Some of you here show this kind of love today. I admire you- you are following in Joseph’s footsteps of sacrifice and love.
Friday I received this picture from Thornwell Home for Children- it is a picture of the 90 kids of Thornwell in front of the Thornwell Presbyterian Church with a huge banner that says, “Thank you Lake Murray PC.” That picture, and your gifts made this Christmas a lot richer—for it reflects a part of the love of Joseph that made Christmas complete.
God became a human child, adopted by a human father- that we might have the opportunity to be adopted by God. God wants to adopt you. I invite you to let Him.